Stevie is sitting on the Christmas tree Mr. Stab is trying to smoke the mistletoe Majid spiked some carrots with some LSD And Craig's eating mince pies, going, "Ho ho ho!" Satan didn't bring us any gifts this year Oops, I mean Santa - yes - Santa Claus Maybe it's because there is no chimney here Maybe his corpse is in the boiler - I don't want no coal or two front teeth No stockings full of toys or sweets The only wrapping that I wanna see Is a plastic bag full of THC - All I want for Christmas Is loads and loads of drugs Then you could be a witness To a miracle from above Santa said that I've been bad But I guess it could be worse I'll laugh if there's no presents But I'll cry if there's no stuff All I want for Christmas Is loads and loads of drugs Cos being sober on Christmas eve Really, really sucks - Craig left cyanide for Rudolph and friends Majid said he'd quit the band, so we can't write any lyrics about him Stab's making doobies out of old dog-ends And Stevie's stealing money from charities I don't want no coal or two front teeth No stockings full of toys or sweets The only wrapping that I wanna see Is a plastic bag full of THC! - All I want for Christmas Is loads and loads of drugs And you could be a witness To a miracle from above Santa said that I've been bad But I guess it could be worse I'll laugh if there's no presents But I'll cry if there's no stuff All I want for Christmas Is loads and loads of drugs Cos being sober on Christmas eve Really, really sucks - All I want for Christmas All I want for Christmas All I want for Christmas All I want for Christmas All I want for Christmas All I want for Christmas All I want for Christmas All I want for Christmas - All I want for Christmas Is loads and loads of drugs Then you could be a witness To a miracle from above Santa said that I've been bad But I guess it could be worse I'll laugh if there's no presents But I'll cry if there's no stuff All I want for Christmas Is loads and loads of drugs Cos being sober on Christmas eve Really, really sucks

They throw you into the deep Cos you're not ready, cos you Sink like a stone Like all the others You spin round the drain The plug is open but you Never, ever Reach the end They'll give you a tag You can't remove it, it's your Product ID Can't change the pricing You're a commodity And there's no refunds Through the circles You descend - Drift into the mine Depth charge from behind I've got a new giver Umbilical wire Add to the cart What a fine way to start Surrogate mother Helps me to die Fall to the ground Hear the cheer of the crowd I've got a new bottle My milk is black Can't feel a thing, Have I been raped again? She wants my loving Until I die - A brand new womb A shiny tomb It's all placenta overdrive A morning breeze Sunset disease Bad machine keeps me alive She'll take care of you She'll tell you what to do It's all placenta overdrive You just wanna breathe You just wanna be Living is just one big skive - They'll stab you in the back And drag you right up Fight infinity rounds Infinity No towel to throw Cos how you sweat is how they Know that you're Worth keeping I once had to know Know all the answers, so they Told me where to go (And where I would go) I once had a friend And then they killed him Cos you're not allowed to Go off-road - - Drift into the mine Depth charge from behind I've got a new giver Umbilical wire Add to the cart What a fine way to start Surrogate mother Helps me to die Fall to the ground Hear the cheer of the crowd I've got a new bottle My milk is black Can't feel a thing, Have I been raped again? She wants my loving Until I die - A brand new womb A shiny tomb It's all placenta overdrive A morning breeze Sunset disease Bad machine keeps me alive She'll take care of you She'll tell you what to do It's all placenta overdrive You just wanna breathe You just wanna be Living is just one big skive